Following are some of my favorite quotes from the TV show "Friends"
Enjoy!!

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[After losing Ben on a city bus; two identical babies are there, but one is wearing a duck outfit and one in a clown outfit]
Joey: I was with him all day, and he was definitely wearing ducks...or clowns.
Chandler: Well, what are we going to do?
Joey: Uh, oh, I know! We'll flip for it.
Chandler: We're going to flip a coin for a baby?!
Joey: You got a better idea?
Chandler, digging a coin out of his pocket: Alright, call it in the air.
Joey: Heads.
Chandler: It's heads.
Joey: Yessssss!
Chandler, frustrated: We have to *assign* heads to something.
Joey: Oh, right. Okay, I got it. Ducks will be heads, because ducks have heads.
Chandler: What kind of scary a** clowns came to *your* birthday?

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Joey: What the heck does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
Monica: Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies? "Help! Come quick, they're still extinct!"

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Chandler: They do me?
Phoebe: You know, like... uh, okay: "Could that report be any later?"
Chandler: I don't sound like that.
Ross: Oh, oh Chandler...
Joey: Yeah, you do.
Ross: "The hills were alive with the sound of music.
Joey: My scones!
Phoebe, Ross, & Joey: "My scones!"
Chandler: Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true. That is so not... That is so not... Oh, shut up!

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Joey: Man this is weird. You ever realize Captain Crunch's eyebrows are actually on his hat?
Chandler: You think that's what's weird? Joey, the man's been captain of a cereal for the last 40 years.

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ROSS: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.

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Joey (watching old videos of Monica): Some girl ate Monica!!! "
 Monica: Shut up, the camera adds 10 pounds. "
Chandler: so how many cameras are actually on you?

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Joey: Oh! Sorry... did I get you?
Chandler: NO, you didn't Get me! It's an electric drill! You Get me, you Kill me!

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Phoebe: "I'm late for...uhhh...my Green Eggs and Eggs discussion group. Tonight is why he would not eat them on a train.

Joey: Ross, have you ever been beaten up before?
Ross: Yeah, sure.
Joey: By someone besides Monica?

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Monica: [Sneeze] Oh, gosh, Phoebe, I think I caught your cold!
Phoebe: You mean you stole it!
Monica: [Sneeze]
Phoebe: Don't cover your mouth when you do that!